Feeling Valued as a Stay-at-Home Parent

When you or your spouse quits a job to stay home with the kids, there’s a period of adjustment. You lose half your income (or more), but you also drop a lot of expenses (like childcare). It can take several weeks, or even months before your new life feels normal.

But one thing that few people talk about is the emotional adjustment to one income living. When you’ve contributed to the family budget for such a long time, how do you feel like a valuable contributor to the family when you no longer bring home any bacon?

At first, not bringing in an income can put a real strain on a marriage. As the stay-at-home spouse, you may feel guilty when you buy yourself anything – even if it’s just new socks – because you aren’t contributing to the family income. You may worry (and often needlessly) about being judged for the purchases you make, even when they are warranted.

The key to overcoming this period is to talk to your spouse. Talk about your fears about living on one-income. Talk with your spouse about his/her expectations for your life as a stay-at-home parent as well as your expectations for the spouse who is working outside the home. Keeping an open line of communication is critical to making single income living successful.

Next, you need to start valuing yourself as a stay-at-home parent. Stay-at-home parents definitely earn their keep (and I’m not just saying that because I am one – I’m also the child of one!).

Here are just a few of the ways stay-at-home parents contribute to their families:

Taking Care of Children
Cooking Meals
Housekeeping and Laundry
Shopping
Pet Care
Maintaining the house and yard
Managing the family finances

The list goes on and on. In fact, according to this fun little calculator at Salary.com, as a stay-at-home mom of three kids under the age of four, my annual income (if I earned one) would be $125,104!

Marcel Proust said, “The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.”

If you want to feel like you’re really contributing to your family as the stay-at-home parent, do your very best with the children and be the best steward of your family’s money that you can be.

Learn how to make the most of every situation in your family and you will feel like the most valuable employee in the world.